(USA/Australia, 93 min.)
Dir. Stuart Beattie, Writ. Stuart Beattie, Kevin Grevioux
Starring: Adam Eckhart, Yvonne Strahovski, Miranda Otto, Bill Nighy, Jai Courtney, Kevin Grevioux
I, Frankenstein opens in theatres today and it is every bit the steaming pile of January release we hoped it would be! This film based on the graphic novel by Kevin Grevioux probably has Mary Shelley spinning in her grave, but audiences in search of cheesy special effects fare might enjoy the so-bad-it’s-good camp of this silly adventure. Herewith, to make the folly of I, Frankenstein far more enjoyable, are the rules for the I, Frankenstein Drinking Game. Pop on your 3D glasses and here we go!
Rules of the I, Frankenstein Drinking Game:
The I, Frankenstein Drinking game is best enjoyed with 3-6 players. Players should choose a character and follow along with the rules. Everyone drinks when an event listed in the rules appears on screen, but players should drink twice if their selected character is responsible for the drinking event.
Step 2: Follow along!
1. Every time there’s an awkward Biblical reference, take a drink. Ex: Leonore (Miranda Otto) renames the creature Adam. (I.e. all players drink once, but the players who picked Leonore and FrankenAdam should drink twice.)
2. Every time I, Frankenstein makes a cheesy referenced to the original novel/film, take a drink. (Ex. The gargoyle hunters exclaim, “It’s alive. It’s alive!” when they find the FrankenAdam passed out in the snow.)
3. Every time FrankenAdam punches a gargoyle in the face, take a drink.
4. Every time FrankenAdam shows off his sweet, if implausible, Frankenabs, take a drink.
5. Every time FrankenAdam shows off his skills in FrankenFu (or whatever martial arts he does), take a drink.
6. Every time a character comments on whether FrankenAdam does or does not have a soul, take a drink.
7. Every time a character refers to FrankenAdam as “it” and another character offers the corrective “he” or “him”, take a drink.
8. Every time a character bursts into flames, take a drink.
9. Every time Dr. Frankenstein’s notebook introduces another plot twist, take a drink.
10. Every time your selected character speaks with wooden delivery, take a drink. (Drink twice if you note a hint of shame that passes over the actor’s face for appearing in I, Frankenstein.)
11. Every time the film enjoys an awkward cutaway to Dekar, the weird bodyguard (played by Kevin Grevioux) with the deep voice and the knack for pointing out the obvious, take a drink. Drink twice if the audience laughs.
12. When Neberius (Bill Nighy) goes full monster and shouts, “I am the demon prince!” the character playing Neberius must throw his/her hands up in the air and shout “I am the demon prince!” as loud as he/she possibly can while everyone else salutes the demon prince by taking a drink.
13. If your selected character dies, finish your drink and enjoy the film in sobriety as punishment for making such a poor selection.
Bonus rules for the truly adventurous:
14. Every time the audience bursts into laughter, start drinking and don’t stop until the awkward giggles do.
15. Audiences at I, Frankenstein will immediately note the hint of "Batman voice" with which Aaron Eckhart delivers the film’s clunky voiceover. (Henceforth known as the FrankenVoice.) All participants in the I, Frankenstein Drinking Game MUST speak in the FrankenVoice throughout the entirety of the game. If you catch players speaking without the FrankenVoice, they must take a drink.
Step 3: Star rating
Rating: ★ (out of ★★★★★)
I, Frankenstein is currently playing in wide release.